Wednesday, September 01, 2004
Six long days and our godfather The Lord, created a land of fabulous beauty filled with all the wealth of nature. Sad that there weren’t any audience to applaud him on his accomplishments. But wait he could make some who would… Ding!! Came our hero Mr. Adam and Ms. Eve.
The Lord said, “My children, all this you see around is yours. You shall eat out of these trees, drink out of these rivers, learn to live with these animals and you will also love this land as you love me and you shall live here for eternity.” He then looked at our hero and said, “oh, my son!! She shall be your wife.” And to Ms. Eve, he said, “He shall be your man.” Little did they know what was coming for them. He then said, “Listen to me carefully, what I am about to say. Eat from any tree you wish to, but not from the wisdom tree for if you do, you shall die.” Fwee… what blackmail!!!!
Adam and Eve, had a romantic walk through the Gardens every day. Admired the birds, amazed at the creations of God, ate for hunger, and drank to quench thirst, made love to each other and dwelled like they would in heaven until…..
Shhhhhhhhhh…. Shhhhhhhhhhhhh.. Sneaked our villain, the serpent. Some also say that it was Satan dressed as a serpent.. Whatever!! The villain sure knew who could be an easy catch, so he waited to poison Eve’s blissful mind in privacy. And he had his chance. So he said, “hey sexy!! What you up to?” Startled, Ms. Eve said, “oh… nothing much.. just picking some fruits.”
Serpent was smart. He said, “Why are you doing that? whatz your husband doing?” Eve – “oh.. Don’t ask me about him. He is sooo lazy. Sleeps all the time or he eats. If nothing else then he makes love. Thatz all.”
“Oh poor Eve!! Here let me help you baby”
“So, did the lord really asked you not to eat from the wisdom tree?”
“Oh.. he never asks.. you know. He just warned us that if we do then we die”
“Damn than guy!! He was just scaring you away from that tree. I am sure you won’t die. Or may be he was just scared that if you do eat from it then you would be just like him.. Smart and vibrant. You know you are damn sexy. And now if you do eat the fruit from the wisdom tree then I bet you are not going to need Adam all the time huh…”
“Are you sure??”
“I am damn sure”
There she fell for it and she plucked a fruit as well. The serpent watched her eat the fruit and he sure was good at his trick. Eve reached home and Adam kissed her. Hmm.. did he wonder that her lips were extra sweet today?? Sure he did. So he kissed her longer.
Bang!! Something hit both of them and they fell on the ground. When they opened their eyes they felt different, embarrassed at the fact that they were naked, and guilty that they disobeyed the great Lord.
God came and saw their disobedience and Eve explained the situation. He ordered Adam and Eve to leave Eden and punished them for their act. He said, “Adam, nothing will come easy hereafter, food, water and even babies. Eve, child birth is gonna be painful, and sometime down the years you both will die of old age, sickness and pain.” He then turned to the serpent and said, “You!!! Deceiver!! You shall hereafter crawl on you stomach and eat mud all you life”
“Whatever!!” said the serpent and our hero and heroine were expelled from the Garden of Eden.
Men (Both Working and on the look out) – “Bloody its all Eve’s fault. Women never have brains. Why the hell did she have to talk to the bloody serpent when she had a charming husband like ADAM”
Women – “Nonsense, its all Adam’s fault.
(a) He was lazy and could not go to fetch fruits.
(b) He was so stupid that he could not protect his wife from some bloody serpent.
(c) He was a coward and could not ask god about anything except for a gal. and
(d) He was such an ass that he could not stop kissing EVE that day and he blames her for it.
GOD – It was all my mistake. Why did I have to plant that bloody wisdom tree right in the middle of Eden at all??
The Serpent (curled up around a tree after a good tasty meal) – GOD!! .. can't these humans ever learn!!!!!!!