Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Are you really proud to be an Indian?

Voting is every citizen's birth right. But it takes a hell to get your voter id done!!

It is soo disheartening to see the plight of our country. Lets take Tamil Nadu for instance. The politics has been soo flooded by one family alone that you see DNA screaming out of it from every direction!! Its not just politics anymore, then came cable connections and television channel networks. Not only in tamil, but also all south indian languages. There is a channel to broadcast only movies, only songs, only scripted news to sound favorable to the ruling government and even only for comedy!! We originally had 4 channels but with a ego clashes inside the family, there are cloned television networks now broadcasting the same old shit.. only multiplied twice!!

Well.. with all these channels, one might hope to see some quality programs. Big disappointment there as well. All they show is purely crap and nothing but more crap. Lets try and list out some of these: movies based on love and varieties of love, movies that worship one man, songs again about love, disgusting comedy and some crappy reality shows!! ditto on all channels mostly during the same time!!

Nothing stops them with politics or television networks. Now the recent craz is with movies. Alright, buckle up for more crap on big screens. Their recent movies shows the wonders of love except for the part where there is a possibility of an outbreak of a deadly disease spread by the hero b'coz his back pack for travel has his dead lover in it!! Don't worry, the hero doesn't believe that she is dead!! Its perfectly alright b'coz thatz wat love is all about ain't it!!

What is their business proposition!!??

They want to be the monopoly is all areas.. and then wat? make a perfect slave out of all of us. Well wat choice do we have? It was quite comforting to know that youngsters these days have got over the infatuations and love theories they had a few years ago and that they are more involved into studies, career and success. Oh wait, with such movies in a row, I am pretty sure we would go back to square one again!!

And before you know it, we are all couch potatoes, blindly waiting for fantasy movies to tell us what emotions are and how life is to be lived. VOILA they have a bunch of stupid slaves at their disposal!!

Alright.. lets get to more serious issue. Most of us, who slog to earn our money, pay about 30% tax. Any idea where it all goes? Let me give you a few expenses accounts:

(1) In maintaining our dead and long gone politician's old houses and individual tombs. I bet many of us have heard phrases like, "this is where the great ****** had his breakfast", "Herez is where our ******** had is bath!!" .. blah blah. I am not saying its wrong.. but won't a memorial tomb do for all great leaders together??

(2) More precisely to TN, any idea how much we spend on our leader's medical expenses, his private nurse, his private helpers (only if he could sit and getup all by himself!!) for the love of god, isn't there a retirement age or a basic health requirement to be in a position like that?? I know every time I got a new job offer, I had to go through a serious of medical test including pregnancy test for god sake!!

(3) For someone who needs extra squad protection (more money paying them!!), how do we even expect him to protect us!!

I do have an innocent question though. Don't very old people pray god that when they die, they die without much pain or suffering and that they die without being a burden on anyone else?? How can you force a body to function more than its expiry date??

For someone whose ears are losing its ability to do its functions, his mouth works faster than his brain commands him to do so!! Either the media or the journalists should really know that he is not talking sense most of the time. If they did understand that I am pretty sure we wouldn't have to read or see a news that talks abt what he said and how stupid he sounded when he said it!! My ears people.. my ears!!!

One doubt though. with one dis-functional eye and the other being quite blurred up, what does he see sitting in the front rows when movie stars are performing on stage!!

There is a big fight inside the family, the media flashes it. They give out statements against each other, the media broadcasts it. And on one fine day they decide to patch up and the media is there is cover that too.. Hello... we have better things to do that watch this sick drama all the time!!

Elections another huge expenses paid by us. What do they promise?? color TV, one rupee rice!! want on earth does it mean!!

During Annadurai's time, one kg of rice cost around Rs 3 so he wished that he could one day help the poor by subsidizing the price to Rs 1. Have they not heard of inflation and value of money!! If I as a tax payer pay Rs 30 per kg of rice, I would still accept if the poor were given the same at a subsidy price of Rs 10/-. But one Rupee!! what do you think you have accomplished by that!!

Every drunken idiot of this state used to give 60% of their everyday salary to their family and drink the rest 40%. But now that they get rice of only Re 1. they give only 40% and drink for the rest 60%. Big achievement fellows!!!

There is more!! The sri lankan issue another sorry mishaps. Have you any idea how those people are treated in our land? They are treated as only refugees. A head count for the politicians. No one cares about how they live and earn their bread for everyday!! None of the locals are willing to offer them any job b'coz they are not sure if these refugees are good people or terrorists.

Why isn't the government care enough abt them? why can't they do a background check on each of the refugees and give them a government recognition so that would help our locals to trust them more easily. Well we don't have enough money for that now do we!! This is why most of them decide to die with dignity in their own land than be treated like nobody is our lands!! With all these discrimination you say Terrorism is infiltrating!!

Honey.. its not infiltrating.. it is something that you are sowing on these lands and watering it everyday with love and care!!

Let talk about the recent bomb blast in mumbai.. There are numerous places is mumbai where the terrorist groups could have attacked and raised their dead counts by hundreds.. why do you think they targeted leading star hotels!! Do any of us think about it. Did any of the politicians say why their target was richest of the rich!!

One of the recent shows on an international television network proudly presented the rough estimate of money the Bachchan family has!! Thatz right, the big B's suit costs atleast 3.5 lakhs!! Brand Ambassdors aye!! Big B, Mrs B, Chotta B and his fairy wife Mrs Ash B alone have a liquidity value of around 2000 crs. So much for bankruptcy huh? And you are thinking why all this terrorism?? Silly you!!

With all those pressing issues on hand.. there is more in the package.. Did you know that there is village full of people who mark their new born with a burning iron!! they believe that if the new born are marked like some cows in the cattle field, no disease or any supernatural black powers would haunt them!! Although there is a high infant mortality there, they are happy with the few that survive the hot bars!!

The Collector, doctors and the police men literally begged these people to not do so and also told them that any complaint received against people who do it would be arrested!! daah.. who is gonna complain if the parents are approving such an atrocity!! Why should you plead to save a life.. what if all those reproducing bunch in the village were given a quick visit by the family planning unit!! well technically its not murder. Atleast they wud be impotent to kill anymore lives!!

I may sound crude.. but whatz happening around us is even more cruel than it is!!

In a country where there is someone to raise a voice against cruelty to animals.. a five year old boy was torn to death by 15 dogs on the most busiest round in bangalore!!

Its hard to be a citizen of a country and not be able to do anything with it!! And most of us have enough on our hands to worry abt.. career.. family.. loans.. banks.. collections department.. and some of us care more abt movie stars, politicians, drinking etc etc...

There could be years and years of culture that can make me proud to be an indian!! but darling.. history is past!! what are we today!! Well I still care about my country thatz really why all these issues hurt me soo badly!! After all this we are doing or NOT DOING... Can I still be proud to be one!!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008


God... I have never heard one word soo many times before!!!

I think by now everyone knows what CIBIL is and what they do!! For someone who does't:

CIBIL: Credit Information Bureau (India) Ltd
They basically have all these financial organizations (banks) as their members. These members will maintain a record of all their end consumers (i.e you, me and everyone like us), their loans, credit cards, repayments and defaults (yeah thatz what they claim!!) with the CIBIL.

When you apply for a new loan or a credit card the banks would verify your records with the CIBIL and if you have a clean record then the loan is processed. Else the banks would throw your case right back at u!!

Now lets talk about what exactly is a clean report!! I believe, that the only way you could be a clean customer in your CIBIL report is, if this is your first ever loan or credit card you are applying for. Don't jump off your seats, I will tell you why I say that:

statutory warning: I have noticed that most the CIBIL issue complaints are on credit cards and not on loans (loan closure letters are given to the consumers and ppl do actually keep them safe!! but there are no closure letter given on credit cards!!! and even if they do ppl tend to loose it atleast after not using that particular credit card for years!!)

(1) you held a credit card ever in your life only becoz they said there was no annual fee on it!! and before the year ended for some reason you decided you won't hold that credit card anymore!!! : surprise.... you have been charged an annual fee and a interest for that and an interest for the interest and bhoom 4 years down the road there is an outstanding of Rs. 15,000 in your name. (I bet you never knew how much you owed them!!)

(2) you had a late payment fee of Rs 100 outstanding in your credit card while you closed it. You disputed with your bank on that and the customer support assured you that its ok now that you have closed your credit outstanding, they would wave you off that charge. You are all happy saving that 100 bucks!! guess wat, you are a CIBIL defaulter with an outstanding of Rs 21000 some 6 years down the road!!

(3) you have all the proof and receipt for making your last payment to the credit cards. flash news: it doesn't matter. Nobody asks you any proof of being clean!! only you know you have been a loyal pay back machine!!! no one else cares!!!

(4) Well let just say some bank denies you a loan / credit card on the basis of this report. you also genuienly want to settle it so it would have affect your credit history for years to come. You have no clue of who do you owe and how much and for wat account!! No on shares that info with you!!

(5) alright, you go to the cibil website ( asking for a credit report on yourself. They do not entertain your request until and unless you have a 9-digit control number from the banker who has declined your loan / credit card application based on the credit report they have pulled on you with the CIBIL. Now, you go to the banker and request that 9-digit number. Banker would say that is confidential and we cannot provide you the same!! And finally the CIBIL will close your case saying "sorry, we cannot help you with that control number". KAPEESH!!


Did you know that this database with CIBIL has all your personal information and you are denied of it!!??

Did you know that CIBIL has no strong system in place to validate any of this information?

Did you know the RBI's complaint form is soo not user friendly!!??

Did you know RBI takes atleast 3 months to investigate such issues if a complaint was posted?

Did you know that CIBIL is not even a public authority!!!??


Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Nepali - most effective way to test your patience

God, until few months back I thought the worst movie I have ever seen was Pachaikilli muthuchcharam. Nepali definitely tops it. What on earth was the director and the producer thinking exactly?

The idea of bringing parallel story lines on the big screen is not a childs play!! Hardly few hollywood movies have painfully succeeded. "Kiss kiss bang bang" was one good example. There is a reason why such movies are not released in India!!!

Ok coming back to the sad reality of this movie, a lover, a jailmate, a mysterious killer with a thick tongue!! and finally an out of the body experience - after life soul!!! Jesus man, find a better way to engage your audience. The design of the movie greatly reminds you of the 12B casting Shyam, Jo and Simran!!

The standard tamil industries vengence formula is to kill the people who affected your life. The only difference in this movie (atleast thatz what they claim!!) is there is no vengence as such, but a pure social concern!! (I can think of a handful of Rajini Kant's movies with the same story line!!). The Stunts also resembles other movies. For instance, when Bharat kills the jailor, it reminds you of the movie Veyil!! The make-up for Nepali reminds you of Kamal's Evano Oruvan. The playboy character is done umteen number of times by the Actor Karthik!! (I don't understant What they claim as new and different in this movie??)

Ooh, there is another interesting thing in the movie. One can learn how best to kill someone without the trace of one's finger prints or any clues!! The killing is followed by clear medical reasoning of how the process actually works!!! Don't you think even without such enlightments, we have enough crimes to fight!!

There is absolutely no excuse for depiciting the police as one of those un-approachable, brainless, nomads. There is a seen where the police call for Karthik (Actor Bharat), actually asking him a favor to give information about someone. Karthik, duely says he would oblige as soon as he can. But when he walks into the police boundaries, he is treated like a criminal!!!

Its one way to spread the knowledge amongst people about the law and order (CSI, special victims units - Watch some star world man!!!), but to tell the public that police men are gonna be police men no matter what is not helping!!!

Last but not the least, the climax was the worst!! Either you say the hero lives to kill more criminals or he faces a sad death. But to show the ghost form of not only Bharat, but also Meera Jasmine and the Nepali guy walking into the light reminds you of the endless episodes of Ghost Whisperer and the concept of crossing over!!!

The movie does not have a big cast: lot of new faces and I personally find some of the new comers better than bharat!! (Prem for instance). Meera Jasmin looks very cute, but looks like the director did not find better ways to get her killed!! Her role was made to look very stupid I should say!!

The story was WRITTEN and DIRECTED by VZ Durai. If this is the kind of movies that he has in mind: Please stop making movies!! A word of advice to Bharat - Just different make-ups does not make a movie different and good nor does it make you a good actor. When you really want to make movies like this, learn from the masters!! (Navarathiri, Micheal Madhana Kama Rajan!!). Please watch your modulations. Yelling does not mean you are emotional or that you are totally involved in the movie. (Maddy's movie Thambi failed basically because of the high pitch!!)

In total, Nepali is a total waste of time for everyone. The producer, the cast, the audience and in some sense even to the director!!! Gives you a headache!!