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Hello folks,

I know it’s been a while since I visited my blogs... hope you all enjoyed a safe and exciting diwali.

Ever since I went to US, I have been a little cut off from our usual TV schedules. Not that I appreciate the never ending mega serial loops or those fascinating tollywood special stunts, but hey some senseless entertainment at times would do any harm. Though my break from such extravaganza was not long, I guess it was long enough for me to forget what the latest trend was.

Some of the couples (as in jodies) on these mega serials have swapped!!! Some of the mega serials haven't moved an inch!!! Cine industry is remarking old legends and is running out of good stories (as usual), music sucks and guess what I even noticed some of the most liberating ads on the stupid box.

I remember a quote from Steward I guess...

"Business without advertisement is like winking at a girl in the dark: you know what you are doing but no one else does."

This was one of the most important expectations guidelines of any advertisement. I doubt if that is true anymore. Some of the ads talk more about what harm their competitor brand does rather than what good their own product is. Sounds like politics to me!!! Worst come worst basis, an ad only has a catchy celebrity and the concepts are ridiculous and disgusting at times.

For instance, Fanta and Miranda ads were the most awfully moralizing ads I have seen in like a zillion years. I guess smooching around is the best use you can put your mouth to!!! or cheat a petty shop keeper of his money with Fanta caps is the smart kid job!!! Even a simple diaper ad sounds awful. Did anyone notice the ad were the infant moans b'coz his diaper fits him too good that he could do some exercise?? did you happen to close your eyes and listen to those moans!! gosh what is happening to all these ad agencies??!!??

There were times when we complained why would one need to women model in shaving cream ads or men's vests and brief's ads... but I guess those are smaller topics of concern these days.

All of us are aware and we know for sure that these ads attract infants and kids for some reason. They get influenced faster by such ads. Would my mother really want my teenage sister to go and kiss the movie screen while she is in a movie hall with a Miranda in her hand. I would be surprised if she did!!!

We sit on lunch tables, coffee breaks or some of us even blog, to talk about things like how do we let our kids know what is right and what is wrong for them. How they should learn to be responsible for their own actions. and how they should function in order to gain some self respect!! some of us even go to the extent of disputing that western culture develops kids to be way too independent that they lack emotional strings to their own family. Don't we?

Frankly, the time I was in the US, I did not see a single ad that said you could eat on credit and when the shop keeper asks you for money, you can fool him with a bag full of Cool Drink caps. They even say that such a kid is the smartest of all. Do we still expect our kids to grow responsible? I wonder what these social organizations do. They have all the time on earth to dispute a fashion show and media gives so much hype for such things. But what is the result, Ms. World or Ms. Universe have not ceased to exist nor did men stopped drooling over their posters for nothing..!!!

Parents work 16 - 18 hrs a day. Kids tend to spend a lot of time with TV or internet. We seem to have less control over any of these parental substitutes. For all those child lock systems and site blockers, our kids still have subtle but influential exposure to demoralizing propaganda through every bit of what they see. The box doesn't become a stupid box all by itself. It is only such media that makes it stupid. This leaves me with the thought that may be we are too blind to such media-crisy ourselves. Are we guiding our future generations in the right direction!!!!! Are we even capable of it???

There is another whole lot to discuss about the kids market that these big companies are targeting at. Amongst all these traveling and viral fever, I promised my sister that I would do her diwali shopping. So we went to a leading clothes outlet in the city. I was surprised at what my 8 year old sister wanted for diwali. She wanted a saree!!!!

I gave her a big lecture about childhood and the beauty of it and then he finally tells me.. Akka the small gal who compeers for the kids show on TV wears a mini saree and she does look beautiful.. why wouldn't I??? I had no answer for that but I had to refuse her diwali wish. Now I became the villain!!!!!

For pete's sake, we have enough alarms to be concerned about. Cultural shocks, premarital sex, AIDs. Why would we add to our concerns by killing the childhood and its innocents in our kids!!!

Who should bell these cats?? would social organizations be raising their voice against these as well!!!!

All about Sex and nothing but Sex!!

I know all of you are extremely optimistic about the topic.. :P

Well, sorry to disappoint you guyz.. this is just my thoughts on something I recently read in KK's blog about dating, sex, Aids and Gay... if I cannot call this sex what else can we call as sex!!!Sometime back I wrote about sex change (here). May be it is time to think more about it... :)

What drives our sexual needs - mind, heart or just the way the hormones are structured?? some studies show that it is only dolphin's and humanbeings that engage in sex for pleasure.. proof.
Why is this not true with other animals?? I nearly liked one of the reasons that this above study gave - "Competition for females often results in injury or death to males (sometimes!!! of the females themselves)"... :P

Jokes apart, what is it that drives us into sex.. and why is it different in some cases (like homosexuals). That is the natural process of sex and the requirements alters in case of homosexuals. Most likely we do not look for multiple partners (am i assuming here.. may be .. may be not) to engage ourselves in sex.. but the reality is some of us do..

The natural instincts about seeking something exciting and new all the time, may be one of the reason why some of us seek multiple partners over the time zone of active sex life. Ignorance is bliss .. but i guess these days blissfulness gets us AIDS... so beware!! But can educating people about sex and protection alone save us from such outbreaks? Just like in cigarette cases, even a condom cover reads that these do their jobs only 97% of the time... (i know this from "FRIENDS" don't let ur imagination run wild.. :P) Science has a lot of interesting borrowings from Greek.. monogamy is one of them.. but, can monogamy be a solution to this problem?

Well KK's recent post seems to belive that may be opening oneself to broad thinking and modernizing one's cultural arena of the traditional mating rules might be an alternative solution. In simple terms "dating". Not that there is no improvement in the way today's youth think. It is obvious from such blogging and discussions that we are thinking differently and may be we would practise it sooner than we thought. However, the question still remains - if we truely think any differently and can we accomodate such cultural changes into our lifes!!??

If I am to imagine myself setting aside some time, away from my professional life, to date men and explore my expectations about my own future, trust me, I don't see myself doing it well!! I seem to belive that I need to have a fundamental change in my perspectives about life and what it holds for me. To be able to trust and to be able to live upto someone else's trust is one of them.

Trust is a very tricky emotion. I can trust my partner to never cheat on me.. or I can trust my partner to confess in me whenever he cheats on me and then I can forgive him with all my goodness. Again, cheating here is only about his sexual conduct with other women (or men.. as the case may be). But is that all... there are cases were women seem to excuse themselves from monogamy only b'coz they know that their men cheat on them and viceversa. Are we all looking for excuses? Then, what is it truely that matters?

So now to the second topic.. why are there homosexuals? What drives their sexual needs? there is no fertilization or reproduction invloved!! how do we explain this biology? Are these proof enough to say may be sex is driving by emotions some times.. ?? if that is true, then why polygamy? How can ur emotions changes.. (fear remains fear may be the thing that we fear about may change but not fear by itself)

I always wondered why some relationships are soo broken hearted and pain felt when they don't end up in marriage.... is that b'coz u loose the sex right over the other? or is it the thought that someone else is going to have the right now?? b'coz if we loved someone no matter whether it ended up in marriage or not, the love could not change.. could it?

Can answering all these questions give us a solution to our problems - HIV, AIDS!!

Can anyone tell me if there has been cases of AIDS or similar sexual dieases in animals..?? obviously animals never knew monogamy!! so if there are no sexual dieases(no matter what it wud be called) are identified in animals... how did we get it??

lets think aloud.. and try to find out if we have answers to any of these mysteries!!!

Will be back soon.....

GOD - the almighty???

Is it true that god loves us soo much that he always thinks and does everything that is right for us? If he alwayz knows what is right and what is wrong for all of us, then why on earth should we learn good and bad always the hard way??

Look at what the bible says - god created beautiful world, nature, man and women.. loved them equally protected them under his wings!!!... ok so wat if the serpant was created by satan... why did god put the man and women close to the serpant? where was he when they choose to eat the apple??

Today I had a conversation with one of my blogger friend about Bhagawat Gita. He was trying to throw some light about the divinity of god and how he always guides us and gives us the best we deserve.

I disagree. I see the entire war in "Mahabharatha" as a cause of unjustifiable pride, ego, greed, sarcasm, disrespect and more unsatisfied humanly desires. Just becoz there was a symbolization of god (Krishna) taking the pandavas side, doesn't mean that pandavas were the "GOOD" and the kauravas were "BAD"!!

Was god even neutral here? Not to mention the tricks he played on Karna and Thuriyodana to make them most vulnerable to death!!! No matter what the cause was, is it "dharma" to kill ur own family to win a war??

Let us examine this part of the whole mahabharath a lil more explicitly. What was the reason behind pandavas accepting a lavish gift like the mayamahal? what gave panjali the right to humiliate a man for a reason as silly as tripping over an illusion!! what gave her that much of pride and sarcasm? what made pandava irresitable to a game of gambling? what made dharmar bid his wife on the game? what made the rest of the pandavas resist questioning dharmar then? why did that respect for elders fail when they faced their previous generation on the battle field??

My friend also said that Krishna came to guide the pandavas through the difficulties when he saw them make soo many mistakes. Where was he till then?? why did he not choose to take side by the Kauravas?

If everything that pandavas did were humanly mistakes, is a man seeking revenue for the humiliation and all the isolation he went through from his youth make him vulnerable to similar mistakes as well. Why is that pandavars mistakes forgiven and kauravars not!! who gave krishna the right to choose sides? Wasn't he suppose to be neutral!!??

Then my friend said, no krishna gave kauravas a fair chance?? Really?? how many times did Krishna tricked pandavars as he tricked kauravas?? what was all this prejudice about??

I remember reading somewhere that "Mahabharatha" is an epic to tell you how you should not live and "Ramayana" is an epic that tells you how one should live. The irony is both of these are being dominated with soo much of the then cultural hypocrazy that it is hard for me to believe that this is what I want to narrate as bed time stories to my kids as they grow up.

There was a joke sometime back -

Grandma: "beta.. u know Kamsan killed 7 kids b'coz he belived the 8 kid of his sister would kill him and he waited to kill the 8th born child too"

Grandson: "dhadhi... he is an idiot... he should have kept the parents in different jails... then there wudn't have been even a single kid rite!!"

Now who would logically answer this qtn?? but if our future generation is that smart, this may not remain a joke for long. If I happen to tell my kids stories like Ramayanam, Mahabharatham, Silappathikaram.. then they would grow up with similar conflicts as some of us do.

If killing ur own kith and kin on a ego clash that started with a mayamahal is dharma, then we would have to accept one of us killing one of their distance brother for their grandparent's property as dharma too. Is shooting Vaali from back is ethical then I will have to accept my kid throwing stone at his senior from his back as ethical too. If destroying an entire city of Madurai, unjustice was done to kanaki, then when our youth destroy public property b'coz their professors did not correct their papers properly should be looked upon as seeking justice!!!

Should we need to reconsider our ways of living now??

I am not a god-hater.. but when I look behind in my life, there were people who came in my life for a very short period of time, made an impact on me - as if their whole purpose of life is to come into my life at the right moment and help me, and then they vanished leaving a deep hurt!! I sometimes truely belived that god sent these people in my life only b'coz he had to help me at that point of time and he choose to do it through them.

But what gave him the right to take these people away from my life once his purpose was done? Is he making choices for me? what gives him the right to do so? when he created human beings as a bundle of complex emotions ... did he not have a FAQ and technical support document prepared?? Did he not know it was going to hurt me worst when he is going to take away something from me?? or is he going to blame that on Satan and say even I have a satan on my back!!??

That brings us to my starting question... Is god really an almighty.. does he always make the right choices for all of us. It is not just about my or your emotions but as a bigger picture too. Why are there soo much negativity in the world.. no matter how positive we want to think, we still see bad in the world. I can understand certain things like volcano or earth quake... why is there rape, child abuse, killing, hunger and disease? why din't god make good choices for these criminals?

Is it true that all these are called "BAD KARMA"... but every thing freezes at the starting point. Why did god not make a choice to protect adam and eve from eating the filthy apple!!!

Another joke -

two kids sit outside a grave yard, under a tree and count their marbles.

Kid1: white ones are for me and the black ones are for you...

Kid2: ok

Both kids: one for u; one for me; two for u.. two for me...

two men walk by the other side of the grave yard and hear this conversation. They think that god and satan are counting their souls. They whisper abt it and plan to run..

Kid1: he look two of these are trying to run... catch them

and these two run back to their village scared to death!!!

Is there a remote possibility that we are just somekind of chess points and the good (god) and the bad (Evil-satan) are entertaining themselves with a good game of chess!!!

The untold fear

I always believed that, when your heart is hurt, nothing can heel it: Time just gives you bigger wounds to be dressed!!!

You know how sometimes you feel like you are jammed in your throat or you just forgot every word in every language you ever knew? The world just darkens right in front of your eyes and you can do nothing about it!! To me, this happens when I start fighting with myself.

Human emotions can be highly complicated and mine.... gosh... the almighty had made a mistake!!! How is it possible to hold a burning fireball under the waters?? I never felt soo much of hatred in me for someone I love more than I can ever love myself. Thatz exactly the problem. If I cared to love myself more, then may be I wouldn't be contemplating such emotions and I would have moved on. But for now thats just another "what could have been"!!!

The more my mind tries to rationalize my present, my heart keeps fighting between the love and hatred. But some how, life just plays its dirty trick on me again and again. I know the man I love the most, is now a couple of hours drive away from me and yet, I am as helpless as a kid watching her favorite doll drown!!

Well the question still remains... I can always talk to him if I wanted to. But is that true. For anyone to talk, there should be a willing listener!!!

To all the men out there, how many of you truely listen? One's capability to listen is exhibited in the reaction that follows. In a relationship, be it love or friendship, a reaction need not neccessarily be a reciprocation, you could just be responding. But most of us choose to listen to only those things that we want to hear, or choose not to listen at all and thatz exactly what he did!!

The fear of rejection is still understandable. But the fear of being deprived and for reasons I never got to know will always remain as the untold fear in me!!

PS: This post was not intended to regret my past... b'coz I don't. I just wish my time had frozen then!!

A thought on Sex Change!!!

Hello folks...

I know I did not visit this page for quite a loooong time!!! I am currently in the US ... its kind of late.. 1.25 am!! just couldn't sleep, so i was browsing through my cable... and now I am watching the Oprah show on ABC7.

The show was about one of the twins wanting to have a sex change and still caught up in a dilemma about their sexual preferences!!!

Two gals, one of them realised she has feelings for other women.. accepts it and when she was in her early thirties, develops an urge to become a man!!! so she goes through a painful phase of surgery and more surgery and finally she is a he now... but now.. the new he seems to attract attention from gay men and is also quite responding himself!!!

hmm... interesting?? Oprah did talk about scientific reasons for such urge and identical disorders in the twins.. but it sounded more and more complicated as it went. Research is still trying to logically and scientifically explain such complications, but the maybe's and probabilities still exists.

My thought on this is... can we say that may be this could be a key to understand something that we never expect to understand in ourself!!! Has there been a time when you found a perfect match for yourself and felt like... "gosh... only if i was the opposite gender".

There are studies that have proved that there is a feminine part in a man.. and a masculine aspect in a woman. It is also true that when each of our other aspect starts to operate activitely than it should then our sexual orientation changes.

But, can it be possible that all of us are bisexual in some sense!! Can we find both Mr. Perfect and Ms. Enchanting in our lives?? (well i know its kind of hard to find even one of them!! but u know what i mean!!! ;))

I guess I just cracked on what I can do in my free time!!! ooh please... I meant do some reading and research on this thought!!!

yeah you can dream about it.. :P

and yeah if you any thoughts you know where to find me..

syanora!!!

Is Love really divine?

There were times when I closed my eyes, saw my prince charming, of course not on a white horse, but perhaps in a Chevrolet or a Skoda, racing to my rescue and waiting to be rewarded with a passionate kiss. Well, what do we know… Reality sucks!!!

When is it right to fall in love? How do you know if he/she is the right person? How much would you care to dump or about getting dumped?

To me, these contemplations made no sense. There was never a right or a wrong about falling in love, all that matters is, are you ready to accept it if it was wrong?

Love is closely derived from the basic theory of probability calculus. Every bloke has equal chance of being the one in your basket. Selections are made considering no replacement, which means, no bloke gets the same chance twice.

Let’s walk one step at a time. Equal chance!! This thumb rule of the theory is built on the strong assumption that all choices are equally good.. or perhaps bad. Even before any man enters the boyfriend zone, they are all justly scrutinized on various grounds. The purging happens based on their scores on sense of humor, the ability to carry one self in public, the attraction factor, the availability benchmark, good looks, good looks and more good looks. Those who have been considered for scrutiny and are not into the boyfriend zone enjoy the freedom of the friend zone.

Even when such details are perused and carefully marked, most of the time, we are not right the first time. Surprising enough, we master the art of dumping even before mastering the art of picking the right one.

These days I am not sure if there is anyone, who honestly believes that Love can happen only once. We could discuss this at length, but on a different context. Going back to our current talk, now that dumping is executed, the basket is empty and so the eligible bunch gets the spotlight again.

Now, where is divinity in all this? (Gosh!! I caught up with the title at last!!!) I have heard that Divine is never wrong, Divine is unconditional, Divine never hurts, Divine never dies. Then how could love be divine?

All of us are allowed to make mistakes in love. Now is this because of expectations? Well, I guess it is mostly explained by expectations.. at least thatz exactly what my ex-boyfriend said. If that is true, then isn't love conditional. Can there be unconditional love?? (This is open for discussion.)

Do we believe Love hurts!! If it does, then it should hurt both the man and the woman equally. But somehow, the one who gets dumped is always hurt than the one who dumps!!! What could possibly explain this? May be ego!!! (Well, I am just thinking aloud.. don’t take this personally)

Are you comfortable staying in touch with your ex? Could the care and concern you had for them die the minute you believe YOU made a mistake? I have noticed that the one walks away from a relationship feels worse about staying in touch than the one watched them walk away (Mostly!!). Does this mean you are feeling guilty to have made a choice to end it?? Or..

I am sure we could discuss all these in great details - after all the world is filled with experiences. But the bottom line is.. Can we all live with the fact that LOVE is no Divine or do we want to contemplate it?

IS LOVE TRULY DIVINE or IS IT JUST A LANGUAGE OF HORMONES?

Rang De Basanti – Was there a Rang!!!!

Statutory Warning: For the sake of the producer’s money and hard work of the cast & crew, I request all of you to see the movie before reading this review!!

A challenging and a promising start. Sue, the grand daughter of Major General John McKenzie, also a film maker from London, is quite impressed in the history of Indian independence and the revolutionaries who gave their lives in the fight against the British. Her grand father’s diaries, invokes a dream in her to recreate the living legends like Bhagat Singh, in the digital world and she is determined to make her dream, a reality. She lands in India, finds a group of friends to be the most suitable cast for her documentary.

DJ is the most striking young man of all. Hides his fears about reality behind a cheerful smile, lives in the world of his friends, promises a lot and falls in love with the Sue.
Karan is the only son of a busy, wealthy business man and is an introvert. He is highly critical about Indian political deficiencies and values of patriotism. He looks forward to be an NRI soon.
Aslam is a tall, handsome, poetic, open minded Muslim. He spends a lot of his time with friends, so he could avoid confronting his orthodox family and their perception about the “Hindustanis”.
Sukhi is a hyperactive, charming youngster who steals the hearts of his friends and of the audience, with his sense of humor and an innocent haryanvi accent. He claims to be a virgin, and fears that he would die as one!!
Laxman, a strong, idealistic extremist, believes in Indian culture and tradition. He does not hesitate to get violent to protect his values on Indian-ness. He uses politics as a platform to express his freedom of thought and devotion to the nation. Well, he hates Aslam for his Pakistani background and is never available for money.
Sonia is a typical Indian modern girl, with dreams about marriage and life ahead.

Initially, Sue’s script fascinates the young minds for a good laugh and a party time talk. Gradually, they start shooting the documentary and it makes an impression on each of them. Yet, they are not convinced that anyone of them could make a difference to the country and make it a better place to live.

Flt. Lt. Ajay Rathod, Sonia’s finance, is a patriotic soldier, to whom all of them look up to. Though his arguments with Karan and the rest of the group sounds inspiring, his words do not make an impact until his death in a flight crash. His death becomes a political conspiracy and a consequence of corruption.

In the fight for justice, our youngsters face the realities and realize that it is not worth shutting their eyes against it. They plot and execute a flawless murder of the defense minister. Karan discovers that his father also had a hand in the corruption and kills him. The friends choose to make themselves heard, quite load and clear, and so they go on air (threw Radio) and confess to the public directly. Finally, all of them are considered as terrorist and killed by the army.

Though the movie had a brilliant start, in the second half, the anticipation slowly dies off. On technical grounds, I should say, the movie was a good blend of attractive cast, catchy & commercial music numbers. The director seemed to have had a clear vision of what he wanted to reflect on the screen. The camera had done its due diligence. In all it’s a well deserved appreciation for a good team effort.

However, there were certain political flaws in the movie, little too dominant to go unnoticed, which perhaps got forgotten in all the sacrifice and the patriotic heroism.

For instance, a political representative giving standing orders to the police force to execute a lathi charge against a calm moaning crowd, all in front of the media went unquestioned. A foreign visitor, being lathi charged and treated inhumanly would be lawfully indispensable charge against the entire nation. Imagine a load of army men, forcing their way into a radio station, to kill a bunch of unarmed men who are talking live on air. So much to democracy and public awareness!!

At the end, not only that the dead defense minister remains a honest, loyal politician and Late Ajay Rathod a careless flyer.. but, these five men also die as terrorist!!! What were they trying to prove??

I would consider them succeeded, if what they wanted to tell the audience was, if anyone tries to make a difference in India, they die. But if the message was otherwise, I think they lost it somewhere between the intermission and the End!!!

After movies like Dil Chata Hei and Lagan, we did expect a lot more from Amir Khan than what was exhibited. They pushed in causal dialogues with a touch of humor in places where they believed to have built in too much pressure. But truly there were an over dose!!

On a final note - A different climax doesn’t always make it right and not all deaths are due sacrifices.

RANG DE BASANTI – was all BLOOD.